Happy Birthday to Myself | 祝我生日快乐！

作者：Gloria Qiao

Today is my birthday. Without revealing my age, suffice it to say that even by a generous measure of longevity, I feel that I am undoubtedly halfway through my journey.

So, now what?

Where have I been?

Many, many years ago I arrived in this country from China with two thousand dollars in my pocket. Not super proficient in English and lacking real skills. When I first walked into a Burger King, I asked for a “WHO-per”. Unfulfilled by teaching Spanish to affluent undergrads, I abandoned my scholarship in Spanish literature to pursue a legal education. To supplement my income, I worked as a cashier at Chinese restaurants.

In the past two decades, I reinvented myself several times: from a graduate student majoring in Spanish to a licensed lawyer working in big law, then a mid-level procurement manager in silicon valley, and now a founder of a two-year-old startup.

Thought out this journey, I have witnessed the rise of of the internet and its associated phenomena, the birth of the Iphone, the emergence of self-driving cars, and now, the likes of ChatGPT.

I have lived the frustration of being unable to fit in, underestimated, overlooked, misunderstood, and undervalued. I’ve also savored the thrill of pursuing clear goals, being part of a community, contributing to a vision, and ultimately building a team to realize our own aspirations. From all these experiences, what have I learned? And where will this path lead me?

A decade ago, when I quit my lucrative law firm job to embark my MBA journey at Duke Fuqua, many, including my own mother, considered me insane. I couldn’t articulate exactly why, but I just sensed that if I remained on that path, life would drain the last drop of joy out of me. So, in my thirties, as a single mom, I returned to the classroom, interviewed for jobs with significantly less pay than I was making before, and eventually became a junior global supply manager at Apple.

I didn’t have a clear idea of where I was headed. I have switched jobs frequently, spending on an average of two years at each company. I’ve worked for large corporations, mid-size companies, sizable startups, and now a tiny startup of our own. But why? In Steve Jobs's words, it’s all about connecting the dots. And now, after a long and winding journey, all the dots have finally coalesced into a clear picture.

There is a reason I was not content. I have a low tolerance for meaningless work. I’ve always despised lip service. I passionately loathe people who overpromise and underdeliver. Ultimately, I want to build products that make life better, simpler, and more enjoyable.

I’ve always been drawn to exploration, not necessarily to tick items off a bucket list, but to get to know diverse cultures. I love wandering through little towns, conversing with locals, and learning about their happiness and sorrows. I enjoy the local art, food, and culture.

Most importantly, I relish interactions with people who possess aspirations and passion for their work. I enjoy learning about their concerns, sharing stories about our lives, and forging friendships.

Over the past decade, I spent most of my time perfecting this art called procurement. While some may dismiss it as merely buying and haggling, I find it to be an intriguing field while learning a huge variety of subject matters. It encompasses negotiation, strategy, and relationship building. Ultimately, it’s about being a trusted advisor to help people get what they need (and advise them of what they may consider and what they may not need), negotiate a favorable price and achieve savings for the company.

Finally, I’ve always had a natural passion about building better software and better systems. Because I started my career buying software, I have seen the ascent of industry titans such as Workday, Databricks, and Looker. I’ve always hated outdated, clumsy, and clunky software (not naming names) and loved a sleek design, optimal UI, and cutting-edge AI. My passion is to create a superior experience in this field.

This entire journey has led me to this path of building our own software for procurement and legal automation. This is the culmination of my entrepreneurial spirit, my quest for autonomy, my deep passion for technology and innovation, and my ability to connect with people to help them solve a problem. After years of searching, it finally feels like everything has come together, and I am connecting all the dots.

Admittedly, building a company from scratch is a daunting task. Many times I feel this is the most challenging task I’ve ever tackled in my life. But this is also the happiest I’ve ever been when it comes to working. I am finally doing what I WANT to do.

So, what comes next? Build the company. Grow the team. Develop the product. Generate sales. Rinse and repeat.

Anything else I would like to do? May pursue my passion for art further, maybe taking a couple of years of formal training, perhaps in Paris? Learn an instrument and learn to sing and play, maybe the guitar, maybe the piano. Explore countless new destinations. Write a book about my life story, leadership, or even the journey of building a startup. Teach at a law school or business school and finally share my learnings and my passion for coaching. Who knows, inspired by Yellowstone, maybe I’ll run for a political office one day.

Here is to the second half of my life. I am feeling stronger and more powerful than ever.

这几天太浩湖暴雪， 我在小木屋里看着茫茫白雪， 绿螘新醅酒， 红泥小火炉， 想起自己的“我的前半生”， 有感而发。 

到今年， 我在美国的时间已经超过了我在中国的时间。 二十几年以前， 我孤身一人来到这个陌生的国家， 并无一技压身， 更无几两碎银。 从一个教西语的小留学生， 到几乎完全没有外国人的法学院， 再到纽约的大律所， 然后来硅谷做一个负责采购的小职员。 最后， 我终于揭竿而起， 成立了自己的小小的创业公司。 

这些年， 看着大家从互联网泡沫， 到把黑莓换成苹果手机， 然后开始做自动车， 最近又在人工智能ChatGPT 的风口浪尖乘风破浪。 

曾经被忽视， 被误解， 人微言轻，无处藏身。 也曾金戈铁马，杯酒斩华雄，意气风发，彼可取而代之。 如今，虽为时尚早，但有自己的一亩三分地， 可以牛刀小试。 我学到了什么？ 这条路又通往何处？ 

十年以前， 当我毅然抛弃高薪离开律师职位而回美读MBA时， 很多人都不以为然， 我自己的母亲也做如是想。 就连我自己，也完全不知道生活将会走向何处。 我只知道， 如果我再敷衍自己， 生亦何欢？ 所以我以三十岁的高龄， 一拖二的单身妈妈， 去了苹果， 拿着极低薪资开始学着做采购。 

路漫漫其修远。 我从大公司换到小公司， 一次次的换工作， 换工种， 几乎是两年一换。经历了好几个创业公司以后， 最终自己出来创业。 为什么？ 我一直难以回答自己这个问题， 我在寻找什么？ 又在探索什么？ 正像我本家乔教主所言， 最终， 这些点终究会连成一线， 昭显我们的来时路。 

从小我就放荡不羁爱自由。 讨厌没有意义的工作。 憎恨人浮于事。 平生最爱创造能让大家生活更有意义且设计美丽的产品。 

我的理想一直在路上。 并非按部就班， 而是心之所向，四海为家。 我最爱的旅行就是浪荡在乡间， 跟当地人聊个天大天， 喝喝小酒， 尝下当地的人间烟火， 人间之最乐事也。 

我更热爱的， 则是跟三五好友，志同道合，意气风发， 共同做自己热爱的事业， 笑傲江湖， 仗剑天涯。 

过去的十年， 我一直在学习这门叫做采购的艺术。 这并不只是讨价还价， 锱铢必较。 在这个过程中不但可以学到各行各业的专业知识，更涵盖了各种商业谈判，战略步骤，人情练达。 说到底， 我们要让别人对我们建立信任， 把我们尊为谋士， 可以出谋划策， 也许有的东西根本没必要买， 也许买却要买另外一家的， 此中之道深矣。 可以为公司添砖加瓦， 省钱省力， 何乐而不为？ 

与此同时， 我也一直对好的系统， 软件， 方法论心向往之。 因为从一开始就做软件， 我见了太多的灵活，优美又美丽的系统， 也恨透了老旧， 繁冗，难用的软件。 说到底， 我相信我们应该给用户一个好的体验。 

万途归一， 这段旅程终于让我决定建立一个自己的采购和法务的自动化软件。 所有对真实痛苦的体会， 对创新的向往， 对自立门户的憧憬和帮真正的用户解决问题的热情都归于此处。 多少年的上下求索， 终于彰显了它的意义。 这才是我的宿命。 

说实在的， 从零到一建一个自己的公司真的很难。 有时候我觉得我这辈子从没做个这么难的事情。 但这也确实是我此生以来最快乐的时光。 无论如何， 终于有一次， 我在做我想要做的事情。

那接下来呢？ 把公司做大。 扩大团队。 开发产品。 完成销售。 然后再次循环。 

那我还想要做些什么呢？ 我是个自学成才的画家。 也许去正式的学习一下， 最好是在巴黎。 也许学一种乐器， 可以自己弹唱的那种， 也许是吉他，或者钢琴？ 当然是走仗剑走天涯的的旅程。 或者写一本书， 关于领袖力， 或者创业以来的心路历程？ 也许去像先父一样做个老师， 教教法学院或者商学院？看来电视剧黄石， 我还甚至有些想从政呢。 

一生很长也很短。 以此， 致敬我的前半生。 来着可追，彼方尚有荣光在。